Rainbow Dreams and Reality

At nineteen, you are practically sane. The transience from the fantasy world of sub-teenage into a reality-oriented state of world is so very gradual. Where did the platinum link snap?
Was it when you realized at thirteen that you are not going to be the first woman astronaut. Not even second or third. Or at fifteen when you just knew that you are not going to be the grand master at chess? Or at sixteen years 4 months when you found First year Physics so tough that you realized you wont be winning a Nobel prize?
Suddenly, it explodes in your head that you are not going to be any of these things. You are not even going to be rescued by Lochinvar. Your dog is not going to be as smart as Timmy of the Famous Five.
And what’s more, it does not really matter. It does not matter that you are not going to paint the sunrise in Darjeeling or be the famous, beautiful, talented and witty film star.
It is a stage now, of deadly acceptance of these cherished impossible dreams and a thriving to work for reality. You begin to aim for decent marks in exams or win a consolation prize in the ‘Match the star’ contest.
That brilliant novel ranking as a ‘best-seller’ for months will never be written by you. But it ceases to matter.
The world will not really mind if you do not win half a dozen gold medals at the Olympics or if you do not dazzle the corners of the universe with your eloquence. The English Channel will be crossed by others and your neighbour may hit a million dollar jackpot.
Chances of the Queen of England calling you charming.. quite charming is seemingly remote as your meeting that tall, dark, rich, handsome, purposeful man. The boy-next-door will serve the purpose.
Those rainbow dreams have floated away gently at some moment or the other. The world seems full of people so much more beautiful, brilliant and talented than you.
The Everest which you will never scale will stand mighty in its solitary grandeur through generations. Tom cruise is married and there are already several women prime ministers… Boom! The bubble bursts!
You have now become a normal, well-adjusted, reality-oriented, sensible, down-to-earth (no I did not say materialistic), practical (I did not even say self-centred) person in the World!
Congrats!

“I complained not having shoes until I met a man not having feet”!

Someone has rightly said “I complained not having shoes until I met a man not having feet”!

I often feel am the most unlucky, cursed person on earth.. I never came first in class, I never could be a good sportsperson, I never had a beautiful face or a great figure, I never got the handsomest and coolest guy in town, I never was rich enough, I never had a great car, I never was popular enough, I never could do anything extra ordinary in my career which would make me stand apart from the rest.. I never could enjoy life.. for me everything was insufficient, inadequate.. I always ended up doing something stupid I never should have done, ended up believing and loving wrong persons I never should have associated myself with…..

I used to appreciate all the Page 3 personalities, all the cool guys and gals in town and admire their picture perfect glamorous life and think maybe God is partial.. may be He loves them more than me.. may be I am the tinniest little insignificant creature He created some 23 years ago and then totally forgot that I even existed!

Now let me tell you a small incident. One day I was traveling in a sleeper class compartment of a train (all the while sulking that I couldn’t get a reservation in AC) where I met this blind man who was selling Agarbattis..Here I was sweating and grunting of my plight hating the fatso sitting next to me and there this fellow came in dirty, slightly torn clothes, wearing black oversized cheap dark glasses, singing an old song “Ek Radha Ek Meera” from the movie ‘Ram teri ganga maili ho gayi’ (I may not have mentioned the movie’s name correctly). He had this broad smile on his face, happily enjoying the song and singing it in a Bihari accent.. I felt pity on him.. Oh! He’s so poor, a physically challenged person. So I bought an Agarbati from him without bargaining (which I generally do as it’s a common female trait but to be honest am very bad at it! ). After that he went away but I still couldn’t get rid of the song from my mind.. so I was humming it inside my mind all the while pitying that poor fellow.. but when I tried to visualize him in my mind, I got to mark that even though his face was shabby and dirty and mine was cleaner and prettier, there was one huge difference- He was smiling, his face was happy! And mine was like a green frog! So who should pity whom? Then I realized there’s nothing more important than being happy… no matter how beautiful you get, no matter how rich you get… if you are not happy in your life, if you don’t have love then you are more unlucky than even the beggars!

I also learned one more thing- If I ever feel dissatisfied with my life or with anything, I’ll first think of someone less privileged than me… and then think are they better than me? I atleast get to eat good food 3 times a day, I have the most loving parents, a very sweet brother, some wonderful friends, a great life partner who are all fit and fine and comfortable in their life.. so what else do I need? Beauty too will fade away in the next ten years.. after, we all get wrinkled and fat, nobody can make out who was the ugly duckling and who was the beauty queen in college days!

Pity those people who dont get even 2 meals to eat per day leave alone eating at McDonalds and KFC. Pity those people who pull rickshaws and never could think of owning or even getting a ride in a CRV. Pity those people who don’t have a parent/ parents or sibling or spouse or lover and everyday have to live with the bitter truth that they can never touch them again or tell them how much they love them rather than us fighting with our parents and siblings on trivial matters or breaking up with our lover for a better gal/guy.

So who’s unlucky more? Me? No no! Now I feel thankful to God that he has till now taken good care of my loved ones and mine and given me all that I need in my life to be content and happy with and would pray that he continues to do so…

I need to realize their values and always preserve them.. and I should try to help out all those people who are deprived of the basic needs of life or are in pain.. then only I’ll be truly happy and so will God be! And my dear friends, you all should also try to be happy in your life and respect and value all that is dear and important to you, help the needy and come out of the fake materialistic cocoon that you yourself created and see and enjoy the spirit of Life!